I was raised to be polite. Give more than I take. Be grateful at every turn.
While these traits are important within the balance of a purpose-filled life, I did so at the cost of my authenticity.
Authenticity: “true to one’s own personality, spirit, or character
is sincere and authentic with no pretensions”
The key word in the definition above for me is Spirit. When I honour the core of who I am…my spirit…I am being authentic.
I came back to a book I read a couple of years ago: “The Four Agreements” by Don Miguel Ruiz The last of the 4 agreements is “Always do your best”. My best will change from day-to-day based on the energy I have and the reality of what’s going on in my life.
Some days I’m top shelf, other days I’m proud to just show up.
I realized today that my best is to be authentically me. My best is not what others want of and from me. There will always be a level of expectation within relationships, and obviously careers; however…
I have ignored my gut at times in order to be “polite”.
I have given of my energy to the wrong people who didn’t treat me with respect.
I have been grateful for terrible events that have come up in my life when I should have felt whatever feelings came about as a result. I pacified the anger or grief with positivity and gratitude.
So I’m just doing Me. In all of life’s messy and life’s beauty. Both are the reality of everyone’s life.
My spirit is giving, kind, harmonious and loving. But it’s also stubborn, tenacious, sassy, justice seeking, and fiercely protective of my rights and freedom.
My goal is to create a truly authentic, joy filled life with genuine relationships. Ambiguity be gone. I and YOU deserve a circle of influence full of strength, support, acceptance, and love. And we can be that for others. In fact, Positive OUT comes before Positive IN. But to be a positive person does not mean I need to pacify my feelings. I learned that this year as I’ve worked on my character.
I will navigate the rough and gentle waters within my life with grace and dignity, and sometimes with lack of grace and dignity ;)…which is ridiculously authentic. I’m both put together, and wildly disheveled. There’s always a dark and a light side. I will strive to find the light, but the dark is nothing to fear.
Through figuring out who I am as a woman even more this year, I’ve learned when you have the courage to stand in the truth of your spirit, you will attract the same kinda vibe within the people who walk into your world.
I’m doing my best.
From my heart to yours,
Christine
Reclaiming LIFE 