There comes a time in life, when you realize what’s truly important, and it’s usually on the heels of a life-altering event.  I’ve also realized that one quickly forgets the lessons learned during these times when life goes back to normal.  So, I’m taking some time today to write them down so I don’t forget!

You are the one who allows people to treat you a certain way.  If you are being mis-treated, then you have the control to change it. Set some boundaries, and be honest.   This can be especially difficult for softy-people-pleasers like me.  So, I often have to decide if I’m doing something out of guilt, or because I truly want to.

I will no longer waste time on judgemental and negative people. I just won’t because time is precious!  I will focus all of my energy and heart on those that love me for who I am, and that give me the same as I give them…which is understanding, kindness, and support.  I do understand that I need to be a good friend to have good friends.  It’s not about me.  It’s about honest and authentic relationships, where I focus on giving more than I take.

Everyone has a different kind of energy they give off.   I believe that there are two types of people in life, energy-givers and energy-suckers.  I want to be an energy-giver and I try to be conscious of that as I used to be an energy-sucker! That sucks! I love energy-givers.  They make me smile and want to break out into spontaneous dance. I’m truly thankful for them!  There is no telling how much time we have left on this earth, so I want to make the most of it.  Why waste any of it on negativity?  A life full of joy and purpose is there for the TAKING!!! (that deserves three exclamations and an ALL-CAPS)

I may not always agree with other’s choices, but who am I to tell anyone how to run their lives?  It’s their life!  They are the one in control of it.  There is something very rare in finding a network of support who will hold you up when you fall and bring with them a spirit of accountability rather than judgement.  They make you want to be a better person, but it’s by way of example…in how they live their own lives, not in how they think others should live their lives.  I hope that makes sense because it’s a big ah-ha moment for me!  Accountability is different from judgement.

So for my girlfriends:

I don’t care what you look like.

I don’t care what your house looks like…in fact it would make me feel better if you didn’t clean it before I come over.

I don’t care if you are sporting pyjamas, yesterday’s hair do, and your mascara has made a run for it and travelled down your face.

I don’t care if you have a bad-mom day…we all have bad-mom days.

I don’t care if you don’t have a filter, it’s something I lack as well. We can both say inappropriate things at the wrong time.

I don’t care if you want to lose 10, 50,100, or 150 pounds.  I struggle with self-image often.

I don’t care if you are broke and can’t come out for a cocktail. Hopefully we can make time in our busy schedules that I can bring the cocktail to you. I will most likely bring it sporting pyjamas, yesterday’s hair do, and mascara that has made a run for it and travelled down my face.

There comes a time in life when you stop caring about what others think & you focus on the amazing people who are there without judgement & enjoy exactly who you are…as is. If I am there for my friends without judgement, then I should accept the same for myself. Isn’t that refreshing!?! Yup it is!

Tis the season for a Christmas Song…

From my heart to yours,

Christine