Lifestyle – Page 10 – Reclaiming LIFE

Self-Efficacy: The Power of Beliefs

Published on May 3, 2014May 3, 2014 by ChristineLeave a comment

I went for an outside run the other day, my first outside run of Spring. We’ve had an extremely long winter here in Alberta, and I just couldn’t will myself to dodge ice and puddles so I opted for a winter of stationary cycling to nowhere. As I was running, the banter within my head started taking over with each stride. “I’ve taken too much time off, my pace is much slower now.” and “I bet I look like Phoebe from Friends when I run.”

As my unproductive self talk skipped like a broken record in my head, I found myself wanting to turn around and go home. I recognized this pattern of discouraging thinking from years of practice. These are the thoughts that give me an excuse to slip back into old behaviours that produce little action. The old version of me who was happy to sit on the sidelines of life and doubted I could be an active person, so I didn’t even try.

I realized this “not trying” thing, is something I’ve done for a large part of my adult life. Dreams are just dreams, because of my fear of failure.

And then out of nowhere, one powerful confident thought popped into my head. “You don’t live there anymore.”

It took me off guard…where did that come from?!

“Those old beliefs no longer serve you. Let them go. Keep calm and run. No matter how slow your pace is now, you are trying. You’re doing.”

And with that, I kept on running further than I have every ran before. I had some time to think about it when my run was over, and I realized there is always a payoff when living within behaviours that are destructive. So what exactly is the payoff to living a complacent life void of action? It’s safe within my comfort zone. There’s no failure there, because there’s no trying. Hmmmmm, interesting. And then I thought about the payoff within active living. There’s so many positives, it makes me feel ridiculous for comparing the two.

I don’t live there anymore.

Recently, I decided to pursue a 10 yr dream of getting my Personal Training Certification. I’m half way there. Out of all the information I’ve read through in the text-book, the one term that has stuck with me most is this: “Self-Efficacy”

Wikipedia’s definition: “Self-efficacy is the extent or strength of one’s belief in one’s own ability to complete tasks and reach goals.”

The strength within a personal belief in one’s ability is a key factor to successfully reaching a goal.

There is both power and destruction within our beliefs.

Self-Efficacy is so interesting to me, as I realized I have the power to mould my actions through my beliefs. I thought back to where I was at the start of this journey, and I truly believed I couldn’t do it. The end goal was too big. How was I going to lose close to 100 pounds?! I believed I was weak, void of will-power, with little motivation. At some point, you just have to dive into a goal and push the negative beliefs to the side. What made me dive in? One tiny little positive thought: “Start small”

I will never forget my first attempt at jogging. I drove to the Vermilion Provincial Park, put on a brand new pair of Nikes, and started walking. I told myself I would walk for 20 minutes, and jog for part of it. I jogged for increments of 20 seconds. I felt both freedom and discouragement within that first walk/jog.

Do it again.

And so that began my journey with exercise. As I successfully reached each small goal, my beliefs turned from “I can’t” to “I think I can” to “I know I can” to “what goal is next?”.

I realized the importance of music to set pace and cope with feelings that I didn’t want to deal with. I ran to Johnny Cash’s cover of “Hurt” when I coped with a miscarriage.

And I ran to Metallica’s “Don’t Tread on Me” when I was frustrated…

And a whole lot of Stevie Nicks when I was feeling nostalgic…

Over the years, my music choices have changed as I’ve grown and learned to embrace life with a lot more positivity. 😉 I’m more apt to choose Top 40 now, as long as it pushes me on. I love the 8tracks app on my iPhone. Check it out: http://8tracks.com

I know I have the ability to shape my actions now. I just need to believe I can do it. And just so you know, you can do it too. Your beliefs hold the power.

Here’s an interesting read on enhancing self-efficacy: http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/flourish/201002/if-you-think-you-can-t-think-again-the-sway-self-efficacy

From my heart to yours,

Christine

A Beautiful Life within the Details

Published on April 15, 2014 by Christine8 Comments

I woke up to the first rays of morning light diffused through our bedroom window. It’s been such a long winter, oh how I appreciate the sunlight and the above zero temperatures.

Wiping sleep from my eyes and patting down wisps of crazy hair, I walk down the stairs to the kitchen. Why is every light on? I remark inwardly that my oldest son must have gotten up for his 11 p.m. snack of a couple of buns with melted peanut butter. As my coffee brews, I look out into the back yard willing the grass to turn from brown to green. I decide I’ll go look for patches of green later in the day, the firsts signs of spring will melt the icicles off of any Albertan’s heart.

Coffee in hand, I check my calendar to see what is on the agenda for this week. I always feel one step behind with work, kid’s after-school stuff, and kid’s school assignments. I mentally take note of this week’s tasks: 2 photo shoots (pretty excited for these), a school bake sale, my first attempt at hot yoga with a friend, Volunteer tea at the school, School forms to hand in, and packing to visit family for Easter. No one tells you that you will feel like you are going back to school when you have kids.

I feel that familiar nagging sense…the monkey that was chillin’ in the corner, meanders over, wraps his little monkey hands around my long neck and then settles onto my back. Hello Monkey on my back, haven’t felt you for a day.

I wonder what about this week makes me feel this way. Almost all of those tasks are doable. I am after all a grown ass woman with the capacity to juggle. I decide it’s the bake sale. It wasn’t until I volunteered to hand out bake sale items years ago that I understood the pressure that can come with such a little assignment. To see the kid’s faces when a Mom puts in extra effort to make a seasonal treat is pretty cute. Kids will also turn into socialite snobs if the treats don’t live up to their refined sugar-lovin’ palate.

You see, a week ago, at 8:20 a.m. (10 minutes before the kids leave for school), my son moseys into the kitchen and announces that he needs bake sale items for that morning. Mother Hubbard!!! As I was hastily making popcorn and looking for some sort of worthy receptacle to house the popping buggers, my son giggles and says “silly me Mom, it’s next Wednesday but I’ll take that popcorn in my lunch. Cool?!”

Back to this morning, in the words of my Dad “I beam up the internet computer” to search for an Easter themed bake sale item on Pinterest. My sorting parameters are this: quick, under 5 baking ingredients, preferably no oven required, but still worthy to bring an oooooooh or an ahhhhhh out of a Kindergarten’s mouth hole. I find the addition of chocolate can produce this result.

I decide on this little diddy…

Perfecto. A while ago, the parent’s association sent a letter home that bake sale were now going to be healthy items. So I made a healthy item, and tried to push my healthy fair (like that shady puppet on Sesame street trying to sell an “O”) among the table of cupcakes and chocolate cookies only to bring those healthy treats home with me.

Pssssttttt…how would ya like to buy a healthy treat?! Circular and not sweet…

Sorry, I can’t compete with cupcakes. I’ll add some oats to chocolate and call it a day.

I inwardly congratulate myself on not being a loser Mom today, because that’s how I felt last week. My house was in shambles, laundry piled to the roof while I compiled a year’s worth of tax receipts. I missed sending the registration to school for my son’s introduction into Junior High next year. The finale was on one special night when I awoke to the melodic sounds of a puking shitting dog. Yay. On the day my dog blew up, I had convinced myself his kidneys were shutting down by the end of day. I stalked him in our yard and didn’t see him pee once. Turns out he ate garbage because I left the door open a crack. I like to think he sauntered up to the slightly ajar cupboard door, opened his little dog peepers real big and said “hmmmm, what do we have here?”. Then he quietly opens it with his little paw hand like a human (he stands upright at this point) tenderly picking out garbage food. Sets himself a miniature dog table where he cuts garbage food with a fork and knife after tying a mini handkerchief around his hairy chest.

Anywhoooo, I wasn’t a loser today. Nope, I was calm, collected and competent. Look at me pinning recipes like a Martha.

Wrapped in her favourite fluffy blanket, my daughter shuffled slowly into my office and leaned into me cheek first. That’s how she hugs. She leans in, clenches her eyes, and waits for her hug and kiss. It’s adorable.

I yell up the stairs to my other two sleeping kids and start on breakfast. My son Lukey comes down already dressed and ready to attack the day with his trademark unbridled energy. I told myself I wouldn’t be that Mom who would make different things for each kid, yet here I was getting cereal with OJ for one and a peanut butter bun with bananas for another. It’s just easier that way. One size does not fit all in this house. Lukey loves left overs, it’s not uncommon to walk into the kitchen first thing and see him bellied up to the island eating mashed potatoes and steak.

My oldest son listens to Metallica while he gets ready. He yells a good-bye as he sprints out the door and revs up his ’87 Chevy to go to high school. He’s a great kid with a killer sense of humour. I wonder how he became so responsible. Lord knows I wasn’t as responsible at his age. I decide to apologize to my parents next time I see them for not being a responsible teen. I may even buy them a greeting card. Note to self: buy a greeting card suitable to wash away 18 years of frustrated memories. I wonder if perhaps my parents have forgotten the time I convinced my sister to tie sheets together and climb out the second story bedroom window. I am thankful the wood pallets broke her fall. I also wonder why my parents never replaced that chunk of carpet in their bedroom I burned while lighting kleenex on fire. One has a hard time forgetting that when you step on a burnt patch of carpet right beside your own bed for years.

Off track again…

I start on the younger kid’s lunches, sign agendas and out-dated forms with a hand-written “hope it’s not too late to hand in”. I always add a smiley face because I figure that will make it better. The smiley face is a lost art. My favourite thing to do to my husband is to add a smiley face and dot his “I” with a heart after he signs the bill at restaurants. ha! What an ass I am.

I realize we are running late. I brush the knots out of my daughter’s hair while she shrugs her shoulders and grimaces with each stroke of the brush. Note to self: make hair appointment to get it thinned out. I repeat myself in a raised voice that can only be likened to Grover. “We are going to be late, let’s go!” No one can find frickin’ socks. Where do the socks go? After getting the kids out the door at a feverish pace, it takes seconds for the Mom-guilt to settle in like a thick fog. I think about all the ways I could have shown more patience, and reprimand myself for not signing forms on time. From Mom-hero to Mom-zero in 10 minutes flat.

Which brings me to the purpose of this post. This crazy, always-behind, calendar of tasks is the small picture. I will miss this some day. In thinking about this time leaving, I already feel the pangs of missing it. My kids need me, and I need them. We may not be a well-oiled machine, but we work.

I am perfectly imperfect. It’s not my job to pretend I’m a perfect Mom because life is imperfect. Authenticity lives within imperfections.

We love.

We fight.

We make-up.

We love some more.

I will treasure the way my daughter Tess leans in for hugs cheek first, hates getting her hair brushed, and needs solitude as she eats her cereal in peace in the morning.

I will treasure the way my oldest son Ty listens to Metallica in the morning, eats 11 p.m. snacks, and revs his truck a little too loud.

I will treasure the way my middle child Luke eats steak and potatoes for breakfast, can never find matching socks, insights panic over the wrong bake sale day, and wears collared shirts under hoodies everyday (buttoned right to the top).

These little seemingly insignificant details are what makes up a childhood. They are what makes up the memories a Mom will always hold dear to her heart.

I hope you can find the beauty in your own little life details today and embrace imperfection. Because it’s beautiful.

From my heart to yours,

Christine

7 Gym Myths Debunked via a Former Couch Potato

Published on April 14, 2014April 15, 2014 by ChristineLeave a comment

Recently at the gym, I was talking to one of the trainers. I commented to him that the gym was abnormally quiet, just a handful of people worked their little hearts out. What he said in reply got me thinking. He said: “it’s the same regulars here today, there’s not an overweight person in here.”

I hadn’t noticed the physical shape of anyone there, I was focussed on my workout. While I didn’t take that comment as judgmental, but rather an observation of the gym culture at that moment, it did put me right back into my pre-exercising head. I wondered why I didn’t feel like I “belonged” at the gym when I started this journey. I remember being fearful of the gym, all that equipment that I didn’t know how to use, all those fit bodies…like they would all stare at me and judge me while I worked out. I wish I knew then what I know now.

So I’m writing this to the fearful 242 pound couch-potato Me of the past…

from the dorky gym-lover of the future…

Myths and Fears of the Gym

Myth #1: Everyone will stare at me or worse yet, they will laugh at me.

Everyone at the gym is there to get their sweat on. No one is looking at anyone else. Chances are, many of them have the same insecurities as I do. The gym is just a place to go to work all your frustrations out, and show a little love to your heart and body in the process.

Myth #2: I’ll be embarrassed by my red-faced sweaty face.

Sweat is just our body’s way of cooling our internal rising temperature as we exercise. If we are sweating, that means we are working hard. If we are working hard, we are achieving our goal to get our heart rate elevated. As our heart rate elevates, we are actively burning calories. Further to that, the calories we burn at the gym are just a small part of the calories we burn after we leave the gym. Are you sweating during your workout? Congratulations, you are working hard! Personally, when I see someone sweating a lot during their workout, I have a lot of respect for how hard they are working. It motivates me to work even harder.

Myth #3: No one will show me how to use all that equipment.

There are always attendants & trainers walking the floor. Most gyms will show you free of charge how to use each piece of equipment. You probably have a friend who knows how to use them all. Ask them. Ask a stranger at the gym how to use a piece of equipment. People are happy to help.

Here my friend Kristine helped me out one day by showing me how to stretch using a roller after my run. Like a weirdo I took pictures of her so I’d remember how to do it for next time. ha!

Another day, my friend Linda showed Bon and I how to use a Squat rack…

I’m very thankful for their help!

Myth #4: The weight training area is for Men. Women will get big and bulky if they lift weights.

I bought into this myth big time. I used to think the weight training area was for “muscle heads”. If anything, strength training is especially important for women as we naturally have less muscle mass than men do. Further to that, as we age, we lose muscle mass. According to the National Academy of Sports Medicine: “Loss of muscle mass, also known as Sarcopenia occurs as a result of aging. After age 35 you will lose between .5-1. Percent of your muscle mass annually unless you engage in regular physical activity to prevent it. By engaging in regular resistance training and following a sound diet that includes adequate amounts of protein, you can prevent most of the muscle loss associated with age. Health experts recommend that you engage in some of the resistance training that focuses on all major muscle groups a minimum of 2 times per week and up to 5 times per week depending upon your goals.”

Ladies, don’t worry about getting big and bulky because of weight training. We just don’t have the genetic makeup for that (or the testosterone). I also didn’t realize how hard it is to build a lot of muscle. I used to picture body builders when I thought about strength training; however to achieve that form, you need to follow a very strict diet and spend a lot of time focussing on each muscle group. It’s not a reality for most of us. So muscle your way into that strength training area and reap the benefits of improved body composition (muscle is more dense than fat, so it takes up less room), improved resting metabolism, sharpened mental focus, reduced signs and symptoms of chronic conditions (arthritis, back pain, diabetes, depression), improved muscle strength and tone (which leads to improvements to daily life activities), improved posture/mobility/balance, reduced risk of osteoporosis, improved blood-pressure, and increased self-esteem. The benefits are endless.

Hire a trainer to show you how to lift with correct technique or join a class. There are also tons of free online resources. My favourites: http://www.bodybuilding.com and http://www.coachcalorie.com

Before you know it, your confidence will rise to the point you no longer feel out-of-place. Our bodies are incredible machines that adapt quickly & positively to increased demands. Adding strength training to your exercise program has huge positive benefits for your future health. Think of it as an investment towards aging with vitality. Everyone belongs in the strength training area. What makes one person more privileged to be there over another? Nonsense. 😉

Myth #5: I don’t have time to go to they gym.

Time management is tricky within our busy lives. Once you really look at the benefits of exercise and how it will positively affect all aspects of our life, isn’t it worth it? Even 30 minutes 3-4 times a week can produce big results. Don’t have 30 minutes in one chunk? Split it up into 10 minute segments. It takes about three weeks to turn an activity into a habit. Just keep at it, and before you know it, exercise will become an essential part of daily life. I often think about how exercise is essential for my positive mind-set. I wish there was a camera showing people their facial expressions before and after a workout. Exercise releases endorphins. There’s a reason they call it “Runner’s High”. You actually feel a high when you are done! ha! How great is that?! Go get your daily exercise high. 🙂

Myth #6: I don’t “belong” at the gym. I’m not one of those fitness junkies.

Oh my, did I believe this myth. Now that I’ve travelled this road to reclaim my life for 10 years now, I now understand the importance of a well-rounded balanced approach to health, happiness, and vitality. It’s not about a number on a scale or a short-term diet. For me, it requires a lifestyle of eating healthy (I follow the 80/20 rule), cardio, strength training, flexibility, and a focus on those elements that feed my soul and mind with positive. The old me would have read that last sentence and rolled my eyes. I just didn’t realize the joy that would come from living this way. The idea that another’s health and well-being is more important than my own is ridiculous. I used to believe taking that time for myself was selfish. It’s not selfish to take care of your body, mind, and soul. It’s essential for health and happiness. Of course we all belong at the very place that houses equipment to improve our cardio/muscular health.

Myth #7: I’ll go to the gym when I’m more fit.

I had to take the power & intimidation out of the word “gym”. It’s just a space to sweat and work. That’s all. What I’ve gained from that atmosphere is something I didn’t expect. Although I prefer to workout alone, I have gained social interaction I didn’t expect. The people I have met at the gym are amazing. There are no classes of people there. Those business professionals who sport a suit in their day jobs wear sweat pants just like I do. We are all the same, working towards a common goal. It’s not about your external appearance, it’s about pushing yourself a little further every time. Gaining confidence with each workout. It’s about feeling pride within your efforts. Why does one have to be at a certain fitness level to enjoy those elements? Again, ridiculous nonsense.

If you share any of these myths that I once believed, I hope I encouraged you to think about the gym atmosphere in a different way. Go try it out if you’ve been fearful to do so…what do you have to lose (except a bunch of calories burned and a whole lot of stress of your shoulders)?

From my heart to yours,

Christine

The Privilege of Complaining

Published on April 10, 2014 by Christine2 Comments

We just returned home from a wonderful first-ever-family tropical vacation to Mexico.

Click HERE for some Ocean/tropical eye-candy.

Leading up to our trip, I researched the resort Sandos Playacar like a mad woman. A chick could spend an entire day reading reviews on Trip Advisor. I know this because I did and after reading many a review I was so confused whether it was good, bad, or so/so. I took the negative reviews with a grain of salt, because I’m not that picky. Give me friends/family, a cold drink, a chair by a pool, food I don’t have to cook, a clean room, and I’m a happy girl.

When we got to the resort and spent our first day playing by the Ocean, swimming in the pool, eating our weight in Mexican fair, and enjoying a few Cerveza’s with my hubby, I couldn’t help but think about how complaining is a privilege to many of us. If we have food on our table, a warm home to call our own, sports to take our children to, a school to attend our Kid’s Christmas concerts, a religion to practice without threat of persecution, words to speak freely, and a relaxing trip to take with our family….then we are privileged.

One of the main complaints I read on the message board was “It’s a really long walk from the rooms to the beach” and “it takes forever to wait for a golf cart to pick people up”. One commenter said “I waited 10 minuets for a golf cart, and I finally just walked there myself.” I was expecting a long walk through hot coals the way many commented about it, and what I found was a 5-10 minute walk tops through beautiful trails surrounded by lush vegetation, birds of paradise, palm trees, & monkeys. Golf carts passed by us every 5-15 minutes. Perhaps I sound like I’m standing on a soap box, but because of my life experiences I feel strongly about this point. To be able to walk or even jog is a gift. If you have your mobility you are blessed. I have witnessed my sister lose all her mobility due to MS. What she wouldn’t give to walk “a really long way” to the Ocean.

Complaint: “they staff didn’t always greet us as we passed by and some didn’t know English”. Ummmm….it’s Mexico. English is not their native language. We are vacationing on their land and the staff work their asses off while we lounge by a pool. I was in awe of how hard they all worked. They work circles around me. It was so hot out, and they were working in that heat with pants/work boots/shirt while we sauntered by (or flew by in a golf cart) sporting bathing suits and flippy floppies.

Complaint: “My clothes were musty when I got home from the humidity.” Ummmm…that’s because there’s an ocean right outside your air-conditioned room.

Complaint: “The food wasn’t that great, we were sick of the buffet after a week.” Ok, the food! There were so many choices everyday and a different choice every night. I had to roll my ass to my room because there was so much delicious food every where we looked. Food for 24 hours of the day. And outside our all-inclusive resort, there is poverty.

Complaint: “It was loud”. Yes, the sounds of people enjoying Zumba, kids laughing in the pool, and music floating on the tropical breeze can be loud for sure.

Complaint: “The rooms are outdated”. I don’t know about you, but I don’t go on Vacation to stare at a modern room. There’s a whole ocean outside the door, and so much eye candy to look at.

Now the irony of a post complaining about complainers is not lost on me. 😉 I’m writing this as a reminder for my own privileged tush too. I have a blessed life. I need to remember that. I complain about ridiculous things.

This is the main reason physical fitness is so important to me. I have the gift of my health and legs that will run if I urge them too. I’m thankful for my health, for my family/friends, for my home, for my life, and for the gift of insight.

From my heart to yours,

Christine

The Issue with Food Issues

Published on March 5, 2014March 5, 2014 by ChristineLeave a comment

I had a conversation with a woman recently about her diet. She eats very differently than I do (now that I’m in the maintaining world). I’m always fascinated with the way others eat. I’m not sure why. No judgements, just interested. The newest fad diets, no carbs, carb cycling, high protein/little carbs, lots of carbs/little protein, Paleo…all of it is interesting to me. I want knowledge for curiosity sake given I’ve found what’s worked for me year 9 of maintaining my healthy weight. Everyone is different in what works for them, and that’s what’s so interesting.

Anywhoooo, after she told me about her diet, I filled her in a bit about my journey of shedding 90 odd pounds, she replied “This way of eating probably wouldn’t work for you because you have food issues.”

Huh. Food issues. I often admit to others I have food issues, but hearing it out of someone else’s mouth had an interesting effect on me as I’m not a fan of labels.

Oh my, I’m one of those weird food issue people. ha! I really thought about it though, and I’m going to own that label.

I have food issues people.

In thinking about it, doesn’t our society promote food issues wildly?! Everywhere you look there’s fat-free, low carb, non-saturated fat, natural, lean, (etc.) labels on all our foods. When you go out to eat, the portions are double what any human would need to get full. My children get fast food at School for hot lunch once a week (don’t get me wrong, I love hot lunch day because I run out of things to put in their lunch…it’s like a day off). I think our whole culture has food issues. How many people do you know that are on a diet right now ladies? How many women do you know that are completely comfortable with their weight? Forgive me for speaking broadly, but we are chasing this elusive goal to be a little thinner, and we want fast fixes. It’s no wonder there’s so many food related advertising. We are never satisfied. Most of the people at the gym are downing protein shakes after their workouts, myself included. That’s not exactly “the way nature would have intended” to ingest our protein. Food advertising is all around us and it’s screwing with our minds.

I often have to take a step back and remember that my goal is to be healthy, balanced, strong, and happy. Restriction does not make me happy. I will turn into a raging beyatch if you take away my occasional indulgence of a good meal out at The Keg, a beautiful glass of red wine, and a square of dark chocolate. I might stab you with a fork if you tell me how many calories are in any of those items. I don’t give a bouncing kangaroo. This maybe an indication I have food issues. I will own that.

If the truth be told, I work out to eat. I’m a foodie. I adore the care and love that is poured into the preparation of a kick-ass meal. I love to cook too. For that fact, I shape my activity around that, and follow the 80/20 rule. 80% healthy, 20% sorta healthy (although I will always maintain that a good steak, glass of red, or dark chocolate will make anyone happier).

What is my point?! I have food issues, you may have food issues, our advertising/talk shows/magazine covers definitely promote food issues. It’s OK to have food issues. I felt all shamey in the moment when that woman said that to me, but there’s no shame in it. I’m not alone, I know that.

So I’m going to stick to what I know, and just keep eating foods that come from nature. Foods that are not processed. Foods that are brightly coloured and my protein used to run away from hunters. I love meat. My beef-farmer-father raised me on it. That’s cool. The way you eat is cool too. It’s none of my business.

The issue I have with food issues, is the idea that I’m alone in my food issues. So here’s me screaming from the roof tops about it (or to 10 people who will read this post…hi Roxy)

This maybe the most pointless, round and round post I’ve ever written.

From my heart to yours,

Christine with the food issue

Empowering Strangers

Published on February 21, 2014 by Christine2 Comments

I’ve thought of ways to empower my daughter to build up her confidence. Which led me to the realization that my confidence level is not what I would hope for my daughter. Which led me to thinking how I can build up my confidence to be an example to my daughter. Which led to the realization that I feel most empowered and confident when I uplift other women. My friends, family, and strangers too.

So how does one empower other women?

You know when you think a positive thought about another woman when you see them? You might admire the way they parent, the way they light up a room by their positive energy, the way they go after their dreams without fear, the way they volunteer their time, the way they work their ass off. Insert positive thought here.

Tell them. Even if you don’t know them. I promise you, a positive affirmation (even from a stranger) will lift up their spirit. They will remember it.

I was at the gym the other day, and I was admiring how hard this one woman was working. She’s there often, and she has definition is her arms that takes a whole lot of sweat and dedication to obtain. And I wondered to myself, does she know that her hard work is paying off? So I silenced the voice in my head that said “don’t compliment a stranger, that’s weird.” I walked over to her and said “I really admire how hard you work, do you know that you have crazy definition in your arms? Your arms are my goal” She just stared at me for a minute, sort of stunned. And my head thought “oh my, she thinks I’m a wack-a-doodle” Finally, she replied with a smile “Thank you so much, I’ve worked at it for years.” Years people! That’s dedication right there. And that was that. We walked our separate ways and continued our workouts. A couple of days later, she was walking in as I was walking out. She stopped me and introduced herself with a big smile and asked me my name. Which officially makes us no longer strangers. ha!

In the process of highlighting the strengths of women around you, you will start to distinguish your own strengths. It opens up the mind to positive. It’s the very reason I love photography so much. To me, photography is looking for beauty in everything. We see objects around us so much that it becomes “ordinary”. We no longer see. Canadians: how ordinary and everyday is snow to us? We live in a sea of white for 6 months of the year. Have you looked at snow with different eyes lately? A snowflake is the most delicate, intricate, beautiful of our “ordinary objects”. Watch the excitement in someone’s eyes who has never seen snow before!

Open your eyes to the beautiful, it’s all around us and it lives within everyone. A face transforms with a smile. There is nothing more beautiful than a smile. It exudes warmth, kindness, connection. Expand your vision of what beauty is, and think about what you find beautiful about your Mom. Your sister. Your daughter. Your friends. When you think about them, it’s not about their outer. It’s who they are as people that make them beautiful…their spirit.

I have very vivid memories of the women who took the time to uplift my spirit. I specifically remember the women whom I didn’t even know. Why would a stranger spread positivity to me? She doesn’t even know me, so there’s nothing in it for her! I guess that’s why it stuck with me.

So today, find something beautiful within the women who cross your path, and then tell them.

From my heart to yours,

Christine

P.S. You are ridiculously beautiful

One Year of Strength Training Results

Published on February 17, 2014 by Christine2 Comments

The other day I weighed in for the first time in weeks and I realized it’s been a full year since I’ve started strength training…thanks to all that I learned from my fabulously focused trainer friend Shannon Olsen and from the kind and inspiring Kristine Rustand of BMS Bootcamps . Prior to working with these wonderful ladies, the majority of my exercise was cardio based with a bit of strength training. For the past year, I have focused on strength training with a bit of cardio. It’s been a complete change in the way I train to maintain my health and wellness. I love the focus and pride weight training gives me.

Because our society can be so weight loss centered…here’s my weigh-in results after one year of strength training:

I lost a total of 0 pounds.

That’s right I weigh exactly the same one year later.

If I were to base my results on the scale, I would feel like I failed or at the very least I would feel like I didn’t make a whole lot of progress.

Weight Loss: 0

BUT…

Strength Gain: I’ve increased the weight I can lift by over 100% in some areas. From squatting my body weight, to squatting 140 pounds for several sets. I’ve gone from a shaky total of 12 pushups to 3 sets of 12 incline pushups. I’ve gone from a dangly no-hope-of-pulling-up-my-own-body-weight to actually being able to do a couple of pull-ups unassisted. That’s HUGE for me. A year ago I had no idea what a deadlift was, today I deadlift a couple of times a week progressing in weight as I gain muscle. At the moment, I’m at 3 sets of 12 lifting 110 pounds. It shocks me each month that I can increase the weight I can lift in every area. It doesn’t seem possible in my limited mindset.

I was always intimidated by the “guy zone” at the gym. The weight training area was off-limits. I felt like I had no business being there. My biggest sense of joy comes from the confidence I have in that area now. When I see the squat rack free, I get all excited. ha! I used to spend my entire time at the gym on a treadmill, running to nowhere. There’s definitely a place for running, but now it’s a part of the plan….not all of my plan.

Aside from my new-found-happiness via weights, the greatest gift has been through the incredibly motivating and uplifting people I’ve met this year by consistently going to the gym the same time of day for a few days a week.

The man who was run over after his motorcycle crash…he spends hours at the gym strengthening his new legs.

I met a man the other day who has two brand new knees. After 6 months at the gym and rehabilitation, he was able to climb the rocks in Mexico and jog on the beach with his grandchildren. He said this to me last week: “take care of your body, because when you get to my age, you need it to enjoy your retirement.”

I met a Mom who found self-confidence and purpose through fitness as she coped with her kids leaving for school.

I met a man the other day who showed me how to use battling ropes. He’s got some years on me, but he kicked my ass! As he showed me all he can do, I could feel how proud he was of his progress. Seriously, kicked. my. ass.

I met a woman who progresses every time I see her. She leaves her heart on the gym floor and through one little compliment I gave her about how she motivated me to work harder, we now exchange smiles and hellos rather than two strangers passing by.

And finally, I’m always encouraged by a man who walks the track as he recovers from a stroke. His strength of body and spirit amazes me. He just keeps going and if you could see the expression of determination on his face you would be inspired to just get out and walk a lap along with him.

I’m sharing all of this today because for years I was caught up in judging myself based on what a stupid scale read. I know many of my friends struggle with this as well.

If you have worked hard towards your goals and you are frustrated with your progress, I want to encourage you to focus on the strength you are building in both your body and mind. Focus on how much farther or longer you can run. Focus on the uplifting of your spirit as you sweat out the stress. Focus on increasing the weight each session or the amount of reps you can do. Focus on uplifting others through the joy you feel. Get out and live! Remember where you started, but more importantly WHY you started. Where you are at today in your fitness, is another person’s goal. Be good to yourself and enjoy the ride.

This past year has been a gift as I’ve learned so much more about the limits (or what I thought was my limits) of my mind and body. The correlation between the two in undeniable.

If you don’t know where to start with weight training, go hire a trainer. It’s worth every dollar! Check out: http://www.bodybuilding.com . Great resources for free! (who doesn’t love free)

From my heart to yours,

Christine

I Am Beautiful (and you are too)

Published on January 29, 2014 by Christine6 Comments

Yesterday in a big gross cloud of anger, I posted this status:

My daughter came home from school in tears because a few girls called her fat in her swim suit. She loves swimming, and now she has anxiety over it. We talked about all the amazing things her body can do…run, swim, walk, get her to anywhere in the world she wants to go someday. More importantly, all the wonderful traits that make her who she is. Her wit, creative mind, kind sensitive soul, tender heart who loves others, her brilliant problem-solving brain. I’m still so angry about it, yet my anger isn’t at those girls. I’m angry that our society is so shallow. Girls are “more” if they dress a certain way into a single digit sized clothing. Exercise and eating healthy isn’t actually about health at all, it’s the newest fad diet to fit into those skinny jeans. There’s nothing healthy about that mind-set. It’s the unhealthy pursuit of an external ideal that will never be obtained. I’m angry that because a girl’s body type isn’t the standard of what society deems as “perfect”, that a girl feels shame. As she stood there with tears streaming down her face, I had a flashback to my own childhood in the locker room of the swimming pool. A difference of 30 years, yet the very same tears. So I laid awake last night wondering what I personally can do to break this cycle. All I came up with is to raise my daughter to love others. To love her body for all it can do. And I will remind her every damn day that she is a collection of amazing strengths that has nothing to do with her clothing size. I will be conscious of how my thoughts and actions will positively or negatively impact her self-esteem. And I will be so very proactive to build her up and build up those around me. “All we need is love”….well maybe that’s a bit naive, but what we DO need more of in this world along with love is empathy, understanding, and a lot more depth.

On behalf of my daughter, I received many messages of love, support, and relatable stories as a result. This issue is one we can all relate to, either because we have dealt with it as a parent or because we’ve been shamed by another who ridiculed some aspect of who we are.

When my daughter came home from school, I met her at the door with this little poster and then the kids and I went to jump on trampolines at the indoor trampoline park because nothing is more fun than bouncing into a big pit of foamy things.

After much (too much) thought, I realized something. I’ve repeated the “You are beautiful” mantra to my daughter yet I have an extremely hard time looking into the mirror and thinking that I am beautiful too.

Let me explain…I’ve been thinking about my beauty in an aesthetic sense. I’ve focussed on my outward appearance and I pick apart all the flaws I see on my body. Yet when I think about the beauty of my children, all I see is who they are as a whole. All of them. Their mind, soul, body, every little fibre of their being. I love it all to bits. I think every molecule of their being is beautiful.

Yet I’ve looked at my reflection with shallow eyes. Who I am has nothing to do with the shape of my body.

So today, and in the days ahead, I will look within and open my eyes to see beyond my outer.

How can I expect my daughter to believe she is beautiful if I secretly don’t believe that I am beautiful? I would never say that out loud, but I think it at times. We are what we think. Self-love is as important for us Moms as it is for our children.

I am beautiful. Perfectly imperfect.

Repeat.

And I hope when you look in the mirror today, you see someone who is ridiculously beautiful.

From my heart to yours,

Christine

More than a Mom

Published on January 22, 2014 by Christine2 Comments

One of the greatest lessons I’ve learned when I became a Mom, didn’t happen until many years as a Mom. And it’s this: I am more than a Mom.

Let me try to articulate the jumbled thoughts that have evolved with each passing year as my kids get older…

When my son was born, I dove head first into a world I knew little about. I had no idea that I would lay awake at night riddled with Mom guilt over all the things I could have done better. Those first years of motherhood, I believed I had joined a culture of supportive women where the price of admission was simply being a Mom. What I’ve learned through various experiences is that women can be very hard on other women as soon as they join that mommy culture.

I quickly learned that truth night 2 of being a Mom. I was 20 when my first son was born, although I don’t remember feeling “too young” for the role. Looking back at it now, I was very naive about so much. I have a very vivid memory of a nurse telling me so. I felt inadequate within 48 hrs. ha!

There’s always debates within the Mom world about Should’s and Shouldn’ts…

You should breast feed, practice attachment parenting, read up on all the newest parenting trends, put the kids in daycare, enrol them in 2 years of play school, etc. insert should here.

You shouldn’t work full-time, go on vacations without the kids, allow them to play video games, be a stay-at-home Mom, etc. insert shouldn’t here.

Don’t should on me! We are all trying our very best to raise our children, and we all have very different ideas and values on the best way to do that. Us Moms need to support other Moms with empathy and understanding. Because this role is hard! We have enough Mom-guilt as is without another Mom throwing a should in our faces or pointing out our inadequacies. Let’s point out one another’s strengths and learn from other Moms.

I had a moment not long ago of greater understanding on what it means to be a Mom thanks to my own Mom’s influence. I have always looked at my Mom as….well….a Mom for obvious reasons; however, now that I’ve grown along with my children, I realize my Mom is a complex woman as we all are. She’s more than a Mom.

We grow right along with our children.

The idea that a woman’s wants/needs, body-image, ideas, need for autonomy, hunger for self-growth, desire for more knowledge, and wish for fun in her life should somehow magically melt away the moment a baby is placed in her arms is ridiculous.

Not that long ago, I had a conversation with an Older gentleman at the gym and I mentioned I had three kids. “You don’t look like you have kids” he replied. And while I didn’t take that as an insult, it did make me think about what it “looks” like to be a Mom. Do we have a dress code? Is my awkward sway-dancing (which is a watered-down version of real dance done in a public place even though the music streaming in my ear holes makes me want to break out in full awkward dance) between sets un-Motherly? Is there a tone of subdued voice I should sport? Am I too advanced in Mom years to wear double pony tails while I workout? Is my ACDC shirt not very Mom-like? Perhaps the slippage of the F-bomb is definitely un-motherly (I’m working on that). I dunno.

What I’ve learned as I’ve aged is that my mind hasn’t aged at all. Yes I’ve grown in wisdom through life experiences, but in my mind I’m still youthful. I hope I will always feel that way. And I hope my daughter doesn’t look at me and believe her hopes and dreams have to be sacrificed the moment she becomes a Mom. That’s if she chooses to become a Mom. The fact us Moms make sacrifices, goes without saying. Of course we do, so do Dads.

Moms…I’m sure we’ve all been in venues where other Moms were harsh in their judgments of our choices. Hell, I’ve done it myself, much to my disappointment. It’s a flaw that I’m even more aware of as I raise my children to be independent, kind, understanding people. There is so much power in love, understanding and support. Let’s give one another a break. We are Women doing our best to be Moms. But we are still youthful women within, no matter what our age.

I’m pretty thankful that I’m surrounded by the support of some amazing (and hilarious, fun-loving) women. I wish I had photos of all the amazing women in my life, a project for this year!

From my heart to yours,

Christine

Feeding the Soul with More and More

Published on January 13, 2014 by ChristineLeave a comment

Living in rich Alberta, Canada, there is no end of “more” all around us. More monetary possessions. More food. More traffic. More dept. More.

When other parts of the world have none. Many of our “problems” really aren’t problems at all. They are First World Problems.

I’m not going to typecast anyone, but I’ll tell you some of the first world problems that I fool myself into believing are actually problems.

1. Gaining weight

I have the luxury of gaining weight…because I have more than enough food in my fridge in order to overindulge. Do you know the amount of people who don’t have this problem?

842 Million people in our world don’t have enough to eat. source: http://www.wfp.org/hunger/stats

Here I am overindulging on the very life force that millions of people need. Not want. Need. People will die today for the very thing I struggle to control. I need to look at food with respect and nourishment.

2. I want to give my kids more than I had

Through the years, my kids have come home with school/friend issues. So and so has better clothes, a nicer bike, a computer, they get to travel every year with their family to a tropical destination. I’ve struggled with worry over my children’s education such as: the classroom is too crowded for my kids to get one-on-one attention.

According to UNICEF, 22,000 children die each day due to poverty. source: http://www.globalissues.org/article/26/poverty-facts-and-stats

According to 2005 enrolment statistics: 72 Million of primary school age children in the developing world were not in school, 57% of those were girls. source: http://www.un.org/millenniumgoals/pdf/mdg2007.pdf

My kids have access to education!

3. It snowed again, it’s cold out, I don’t want to leave my warm home.

Let’s look at my home country: 30,000 Canadians are homeless at any given night, and 200,000 Canadians will experience homelessness in any given year. source: http://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/30-000-canadians-are-homeless-every-night-1.1413016

And I’m looking out the window of my warm home complaining about the weather?

4. My internet is down.

1.6 Billion people, a quarter of humanity, live without electricity. source: http://www.globalissues.org/article/26/poverty-facts-and-stats

I go to the grocery store, conveniently within minutes of my home I might add, shop for too many items, come home and cook on my stove using handy electricity.

In developing Countries, some 2.5 billion people must rely on biomass: fuel wood, charcoal, and animal dung to meet their energy needs for cooking. Indoor air pollution resulting from cooking using biomass claims the life of 1.5 million people each year, more than half of them are below the age of 5. source: http://www.globalissues.org/article/26/poverty-facts-and-stats

I have a stove and electricity my friends…I don’t have to rely on cooking with animal shit as my fuel. AND I don’t have to worry about polluting my big ass home when I do cook.

5. I forgot to call for water for my cooler, now I have to drink tap water.

A low 12% of the world’s population use 85% of the world’s water resources, and these 12% do not live in the third world. source: http://www.globalissues.org/article/26/poverty-facts-and-stats

If you are reading this and you have access to clean water, you and I are in that 12%. We have the essential earth’s recourses just pouring out of our taps, we even use it to fill pools, water our lawns so they are greener, and take our kids to spray parks where they play it.

I think you get my point…

I lost a very important woman and mentor in my life this week, My Aunt Elda. She taught me important life lessons: to count my blessings, to love others, and to live with a thankful heart. She lived her life for people, not things.

I have to check myself. My soul has been fooled to believe I need more; when the reality is I have more than enough. I should be waking up every day with a ridiculously huge smile on my face simply for the fact I have the resources at my fingertips to live, to raise my children in health, to drink, to eat. Why has my focus shifted to the wrong things? Matters of the soul are not things.

So I have to ask myself: What am I doing to make this world a better place? To give more than I take? To love without condition? To be thankful and live with a grateful heart?

Thank you Aunt Elda for teaching me so much about what truly matters in this blessed life.

From my abundantly thankful heart to yours,

Christine