As my life travels along, there’s always a life lesson theme that pops up when I need it most. Maybe it was always there, and I just wasn’t ready to not only hear it; but to apply it to my life.
I was talking to my dear friend Linda Lou yesterday morning (we have the BEST life talks), and we were discussing this concept: What others think about us is none of our business. Now for a people pleaser like myself, that’s crazy talk. lol
Further to letting go of what others think about me, it goes beyond that into relying on my instincts, trusting in myself to make the best choices for me and my kids, and actually LIVING out loud.
Get out of my head, and start living.
What a concept!
I can truly relate almost any life dilemma back to reclaiming my life when I lost the weight, and this is no exception. If I had listened to every opinion out there on the best way to lose weight, oh my…how overwhelming that would have been.
When I’m asked my opinion about a food plan, I try my best to just ask questions: Does it work for YOU and your lifestyle? Is this sustainable for your whole life? Is it excessive leading to frustration? Are you showing self-care by fuelling your body this way (which naturally eliminates most restrictive food plans)? It’s really about creating a healthy relationship with that one thing we need to keep us alive: food. Turn it from a negative view into a positive. I’m in control of my choices. How great is that?
Back to caring what others think: here’s what I learned going though my divorce…
It’s no one’s business.
I certainly don’t owe an explanation to anyone except within my core family unit. It’s no different if I was to go up to someone and say “Why are you still married? Did you think about this?” haha! It’s ridiculous and entitled to think my opinion should have any barring on another’s life choices.
So I worry about me, and my house.
You do you, I do me.
That’s not selfish. It’s trusting in myself and understanding I am doing the best I can with the tools I have. If I keep investing in my personal growth, I will have more tools to be a better version of myself.
Other’s opinions of me are fuelled by their own values, experiences, inner conflicts, curiosity, whatever; but it’s none of my business what other’s think about me. And that’s so freeing.
I’m ready to start living out loud, on my terms. And I am! 🙂 I’m a great Mom. My kids tell me way more than they should 😉 lol They feel safe to share. They have a voice in my home. I’m so proud of them. It’s taken me a long time to be proud of myself as a Mom. I wanted to be perfect, and that’s exhausting. No one relates to perfectionism. It’s actually a barrier to human connection.
I have lived within my head for a long time, and action was halted because of doubt. I want certainty. I enjoy my little comfort zone.
But guess what…nothing grows within comfort. Nothing is certain in life (except death and taxes as that cliché goes). I will never reach my goals if I don’t act on those dreams.
My instincts were a whisper before; now they are a roar I can’t ignore. I now understand it’s because I trust myself again to make the best choices possible for my home. I answer to 3 people (and one God), and those 3 people are a little fierce army I carried around in my body for a bit; but always in my heart.
I would encourage you to listen to your own inner voice. Pay attention to what drives your soul. Understand your core values, and align your life to them (that includes your circle of influence). Spend your valuable time with those who believe, uplift, support you. Those who make you laugh and take your mind to a happy place (those are my favourite kind of people).
You have one life. Be happy, grateful, proud.
But please start living out loud even if your voice shakes…then again that’s my opinion and you certainly don’t have to listen to it. 😉 Touché ha!
In the mean time, I will keep on living, laughing, and trudging on. No one said this life would be easy, and I’m thankful for that. I would never appreciate the light the same way without the darkness. I am standing within my light; and ohhhh my it’s beautiful within it’s imperfection. I have all that I need and I am so grateful.
From my heart to yours,